Thu. May 19th, 2022

Joe Kaiser

Recently, two University of Dallas men’s lacrosse players have decided to take a leap of faith.  Both Stephen “Steven” Joseph and Brien Lank have decided to take their talents elsewhere next semester.

But disdaining the idea of transferring to another school, both these student-athletes have decided to step their game up to the professional level.

“When Paul [Rabil] called me a few weeks ago,” said sophomore Brien Lank, “my first thought was … why didn’t he call sooner?”

Brien admitted that what he was doing was innovative.  “Most think that only D-1 athletes deal with pressure to go pro early,” Brien said, “but my story proves to the sports world that all college athletes face these tough decisions.”

Junior captain, Stephen Joseph, has likewise embraced his trend-setting status.  “I’m aware that what I’m doing may  be frowned upon by certain people,” he admitted, “but LeBron didn’t even go to college.”   Joseph also revealed that certain well-known sports brands had offered endorsements, but that for legal reasons, he could not yet disclose that information.

Both Lank and Joseph are mum about which teams are signing them.  Lank did, however, tell us that he will hold “Decision 2012” in the Cap Bar before the end of the semester.  He claimed that this way, everybody on campus could speculate.  It is rumored that both will sign with the Boston Cannons.

Joseph had one last thing to say, “If you’ve been watching March Madness, you have no doubt seen those student-athlete commercials saying that most ‘go pro in something else,’ but in my case I’m going pro in my sport.  As the late Christopher Wallace once said, ‘I grew up a screw-up, got introduced to the game and blew up.’”

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